I have a question for you. What does it mean to be peaceful? Is it the same as being happy? Contrary to popular belief, it is not. Happiness, just like sadness or anger, is an emotion.
Peace is a state of mind. When we are peaceful, we are not disturbed by our surroundings, or even by the inner chatter or self-talk that we do in our private thoughts. And when that happens, we radiate a certain calmness into the world. Something which touches other people and helps them remain calm too.
We’re not aiming to be irritatingly happy. Nor are we walking around in rose-colored glasses being delusional about our reality. We are simply choosing to focus on being less shaken by all of it. A.k.a. PEACEFUL. We all want that in our over-obligated, chaotic, fast-paced, overworked, and stressful lives. At least, I know I do. So let me share with you five ways to create a peaceful mindset from the perspective of emotional awareness.
Monitor The Emotional Charge
No matter how much we heal ourselves, there are still many ways in which we get triggered and carried away by emotions. Then, we act out, from a place of anger, sadness, or some other kind of underlying emotion of feeling overwhelmed. The way we can become more peaceful is to keep observing the situations which carry an emotional charge in our day-to-day life. There’s a good chance that there are patterns and similarities in seemingly different scenarios.
For instance, even though you may get angry for two very different reasons, what you do after you get angry might be the exact same. You might either slam the door and walk off or get carried away and start blurting out hurtful things.
When you know you have a strong inclination to do certain things under pressure, start asking yourself what you can do instead. Break the cycle of your emotional response and pick something more aligned with a peaceful mindset. Such as, drinking water to physically cool down your fired-up energy, taking deep breaths and staying quiet for about 90 seconds while you observe yourself in the present moment and feel the emotional charge pass out of your system, and reminding yourself to keep an open heart to allow peace to flow. Remember that it will take some practice to break the cycle and shift your response.
Don’t be enticed by the emotional charge.
This may sound counterintuitive, but just like we don’t want to hold on to negative emotions, we don’t want to experience an emotional ‘high’.
Seeking these highs is what creates shopaholic tendencies, and other self-gratifying escapes like binging on food, numbing the mind with countless hours of television, strolling through Facebook, Instagram, or TikTok, etc.
Being aware of our energy dips is important because it helps us perform better.
So start by observing the emotional high, and how you act when you are happy. I once heard a saying, and I am paraphrasing, “don’t act on things when you are angry, don’t make promises when you are happy, and don’t make decisions when you’re sad or when you’re sick.”
Being driven by any range of emotions will make our decisions and actions biased. Just like anger or sadness, let the initial ‘rush’ of happiness leave your system before you move forward with something.
Don’t fan the flames.
When you are spiraling down the emotional trap, observe how your ego mind creates a story around the situation and makes things worse for you. When something bad happens to you once, but you keep thinking about it over and over again, you are reinjuring yourself and becoming your own enemy.
You can end up fanning the flames and exaggerating things, essentially blowing them out of proportion. On the other hand, if an emotion is authentic, and you can simply be with it as its energy moves out of your system, you can be free from the charge within a matter of minutes! It is not necessary to carry the emotion or situation into the future, prolonging your healing for days thus adding more to the mess. So, to practice peace, remember that your mind needs to be on your side, and not working against you.
Fake it till you make it.
Ask yourself what you would do in a situation if you were clearly informed and had all of the facts. This isn’t faking it, as the subheading seemed. It is the simplest way to move yourself into a conscious thinking mindset. The more agitated you are, the further you will be from a peaceful reaction. Take a step back into the mindset of a wise person and operate from there. This may not always happen in the moment. But use this question to reflect on what you could have done instead, and practice doing that going forward.
Choose to stay in peace.
We are often stirred because something didn’t sit right with us. In our belief system, this thing should not have been said or done. And yet, it has been. An important part of the journey to a life of peace and calm then becomes acceptance. Sure, there are things in our private world and in society that will happen that we agree with, and some we will be against it. So, the more accepting we are, the deeper we experience oneness. I am not saying become passive or don’t stand up to things you should, but don’t stress your life about it. Change what you can change. And what you have no power over, let it be. Choose to stay in peace.
Love and Blessings,
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