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Hello Ladies,
Allow me to speak to you one-on-one, sister to sister, and from one Queen to another. I have personally made a shift in the way I choose to live my life going forward. I have learned that I am not the same person I was in my 20s, 30s, or even my 50s, and neither are you. A lot has changed. You don’t think the same way you used to, You don’t have the same desires, and you have matured and learned a lot on your journey in life. Personally, I don’t feel like holding on to unforgiveness anymore. (we will talk about that in another lesson) I don’t feel like being constantly reminded of the wrong choices I've made in life or continue to feel shame, blame, or guilt about my past mistakes, failures, and mess-ups. Therefore, like myself, you can decide to no longer allow others to keep you in the bondage of your past and who you used to be. The Bible indeed teaches us that “all have sinned and come short of the glory of God” or as others would put it, “we all have messed up, so no one can judge you for doing the best you can with what you know”. With that said, you can decide to set some new goals for your life and make them about you and only you. Who says you have to wait until New Year’s to make positive changes in your life? It’s your life and you have been given the freedom to choose YOU! Let’s start here with being consistent with the commitments you make for yourselves and how emotional intelligence can help you obtain your goals.
Emotional intelligence is often referred to as EQ (Emotional Quotient). It involves the ability to recognize, understand, and master your emotions, as well as those of others. OK, ladies, here are some benefits to being consistent with your commitments and how they can help boost your emotional intelligence. It doesn’t matter what your commitment is. It could be something as small as spending 30 minutes in the sun every day just relaxing. It could be a commitment to work on being on time everywhere you go. Another commitment that I am personally working on is not allowing what people say about me to bring me down, change how I feel about myself, or define me in any way that is not conducive to who God says I am. Let's jump right in.
Building Trust
Consistency is the cornerstone of trust. When you consistently fulfill your commitments, whether they are small daily tasks or more significant promises, people begin to trust you. Trust is a fundamental component of emotional intelligence, as it creates a safe and secure environment for open and honest communication. When people trust you, it opens the door for better collaboration and stronger relationships.
Self-Awareness
As I have said many times before this is my favorite component of Emotional intelligence. When I started becoming aware of how I was handling my emotions in different situations, it helped me become aware of the emotions of others and how to respond instead of reacting. I committed to continue to practice this concept and now it comes naturally. When you commit to specific behaviors or routines and consistently follow through, you develop a deeper understanding of your strengths, weaknesses, and triggers. This self-awareness can lead to better emotional regulation.
Accountability
Being consistent with your commitments nurtures a sense of personal accountability. You learn to take responsibility for your actions and their consequences. This accountability is closely tied to emotional intelligence. People with high EQ are more likely to admit their mistakes, learn from them, and take corrective actions. When you consistently hold yourself accountable, you demonstrate maturity and emotional resilience.
Empathy
Empathy is another one of my favorite concepts of emotional intelligence. As a counselor, I hear the stories of a lot of families going through difficult times in their lives. Recently, I have been hearing a lot about how adult children are not empathic to their parents. There seems to be a lot of disrespect and a lack of gratitude for the sacrifices these older parents have made for their adult children. Empathy is simply the ability to understand and share the feelings of others and is a significant component of emotional intelligence. Consistency in keeping commitments can help you become more empathetic because it requires you to consider the feelings and expectations of others. When you consistently meet your obligations, to care for and honor your parents, you demonstrate that you value and respect the needs and emotions of those who love and care for you. This can also be applied to your relationships and friendships.
Conflict Resolution
Ladies don’t get disheartened when you have to deal with conflicts. Also, don’t run away when conflicts arise because conflict is inevitable in any relationship. However, individuals with high emotional intelligence are better equipped to handle conflicts constructively. Consistency in your commitments can help you navigate conflicts effectively by nurturing better communication and understanding. When you consistently follow through on your promises, it becomes easier to discuss issues, find common ground, and reach mutually beneficial solutions.
Adaptability
While consistency is crucial, it's equally important to adapt when circumstances change. Emotional intelligence includes the ability to adapt to new situations and adjust your commitments accordingly. Ladies, allow yourself some flexibility for the unexpected and the unknown. Just because something interrupted your well-laid plan, is not a reason to lose control of your emotions. Pause, take a breath, adapt, and make another plan. By being consistent in your willingness to adapt, you demonstrate flexibility which will help you maintain relationships and navigate challenging situations more successfully.
Ladies, choosing to work on you shows the value you place on yourself. Don’t expect others to treat you better than you treat yourself. Make it a part of your daily routine to boost your emotional intelligence by being consistent with your commitments no matter how large or small they may be.
Love and Blessings
Dr. Doris
“Commitment is what transforms a promise into reality.” Abraham Lincoln
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